10 Signs of a Toxic Boss — and How to Protect Yourself

The morning meeting started like any other, until Sarah presented her new marketing strategy. As she spoke, her boss, Tom, seemed visibly disappointed. “Ha! That’s the stupidest idea I’ve heard,” he interrupted, his voice sharp enough to make everyone flinch. “This is why we’re falling behind — because of team members like you who don’t want to think things through.”

Sarah’s hands trembled as she gathered her papers. This was not the first time her boss had humiliated her. The room sat in uncomfortable silence, everyone averting their eyes — they’d all been in her position before. They knew what she was going through.

Later that day, Tom took credit for Sarah’s idea in an email to the leadership team, changing just enough details to make it his own. There wasn’t anything Sarah could do to prove it was her idea, and the others were afraid to stand up for her because they didn’t want to risk losing their jobs in what was already a tough market.

This is the lived experience for many employees with toxic bosses.

What should you do if your boss’s behavior is bringing everyone down and affecting your wellbeing? When should you consider quitting? And is there anything you can do in the meantime to actually cope with the amount of stress a toxic boss can bring?

In my decade of experience as a workplace culture consultant, I’ve seen just how damaging a toxic boss can be. Here are the signs to help you assess whether your boss is toxic — and what to do if you’re finding yourself in this impossibly difficult situation.

Signs of a Toxic Boss

While some bosses can be annoying, dismissive, or frustrating at times, it doesn’t mean they’re toxic. So, what should you watch out for? Here are 10 toxic boss traits:

1. They lack self-awareness. Toxic bosses lack the ability to recognize and control their emotions. They tend to think that they are right about everything. This inhibits their ability to create resonance with teams and generates resistance to feedback.

2. They lack empathy. Toxic bosses don’t invest time or energy in building relationships to understand how their communication approach may impact others. They struggle to relate to team members’ challenges, perspectives, and emotions, and this in turn leads to low trust.

3. They’re excessively motivated by self-interest. Toxic bosses make everything about them and seek to take credit for the work of others. They are more likely to make risky, attention-grabbing strategic moves, often at the expense of long-term organizational stability.

4. They demonstrate inconsistent behavior. Toxic bosses display unpredictable behavior, and employees may find it difficult to decipher what is expected of them from one day to the next. They are unclear in their communication and often display favoritism or discrimination.

5. They take advantage of power dynamics. Toxic bosses will weaponize their authority, expecting employees to carry out their instructions obediently and without questioning their authority or the value of the work being undertaken.

6. They micromanage. Toxic bosses don’t trust or empower staff, instead they tell people how work should be done or insist on being copied into emails or invited to meetings. They seek to control how you complete your work.

7. They set unreasonable expectations. Toxic bosses may demand results or set deadlines that are unachievable or, their expectations are unclear leading to vague and confusing goals, excessive workloads, and uncertainty.

8. They belittle and demoralize. Toxic bosses will “joke” at the expense of others and talk negatively behind people’s backs. They will rarely have good things to say about people and will look to generate agreement from others that their opinion is true.

9. They seek to blame others. When issues arise or mistakes are made, toxic bosses will look to blame everyone but themselves. They will go to great lengths to explain how others are culpable for the outcomes arising from errors, while exonerating themselves.

10. They’re overconfident about their knowledge. Toxic bosses routinely overestimate their skills and knowledge, leading them to believe that they are better at their job than they actually are. They continually think that they have the knowledge required and reject any suggestions of self-development.

It only takes one of these traits to generate toxicity in the workplace and their impact can be felt across teams and the organization.

The Consequences of Working for a Toxic Boss

If you’re working for a toxic boss, you’re likely well aware of just how damaging it can be. Here are some of the most common impacts:

1. Increased feelings of fear and anxiety. Feelings of fear will permeate not only through your workplace but also into your home. Research shows that as many as one in four employees dread going to work in the morning. Your boss’s toxicity may also lead you to constantly feeling anxious as they undermine your confidence, leaving you worried about your job.

2. Undermined trust. Trust is critical for employee wellbeing, yet the behavior of toxic bosses will erode the trust that you have in them.

3. Low morale. When morale and confidence are low it can undermine your feeling of self-worth, lead to a deterioration in your performance, and have a negative impact on the dynamics of the wider team as well.

4. Increased employee turnover. A toxic boss will not only affect your confidence, they will also decrease your job satisfaction and motivate you to look for another job.

5. Increased risk of serious illness. Numerous studies have found a link between toxic bosses and serious health issues such as depression, high blood pressure, PTSD, anxiety, and even premature aging.

6. Burnout. The expectations of toxic bosses around work-life balance are demanding. They don’t recognize or appreciate your efforts or achievements, and they tend to provide inadequate support for you to succeed. All of this can lead to burnout.

How to Deal with a Toxic Boss — and When to Quit

1. Prioritize your own well-being. First, know that you are your priority, so your starting point should be to first take care of yourself. Recognize which emotions belong to you and which belong to others. If you’re an empath and tend to absorb other people’s emotions, you may find yourself sharing their emotional burden, stress, or outrage about the toxic boss. This might make you feel anxious or concerned on their behalf, affecting your mental health when you already have your own emotions to process. Investing time and energy in hobbies, relationships, and goals outside of work can help maintain perspective and reduce the impact of work-related stress.
   
   Journaling has also been shown to be an effective method to manage emotions. In fact, writing about negative experiences has a positive effect on our mental health. Expressive writing, for example, can result in a reduction in stress and anxiety, and can even bring us greater focus and clarity. Set aside a few minutes each day to write freely about your emotions and experiences at work. Use prompts like “Today I felt…” or “A situation that affected me was…” to explore your feelings.
   
   Mindfulness can also help, and can be practiced in many ways, including using techniques like meditation or deep-breathing exercises to stay grounded and manage stress. This can help you remain calm in difficult situations. A good place to start would be with the 4-7-8 exercise where you breathe in for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 7 seconds, and then breathe out for 8 seconds.

2. Seek constructive dialogue. If you feel you can talk to your boss, attempt to have calm, professional conversation about how their behavior makes you feel. It’s important to be factual. State specific examples, link them to your feelings, and talk about how it undermined your ability to do the work asked of you. Don’t be accusatory or apportion blame. Simply and calmly state how their actions made you feel. It’s important to remain in control of your feelings, and also to make note of anything they may say, in case you need to take the issue further.
   
   Instead of saying: “You signaled that you don’t value me when you passed me over for the new client’s project and said I couldn’t handle competing priorities. It crushed my confidence. I knew I could do it, but it seems you didn’t trust me enough. You also point out my mistakes in front of everyone, making me appear careless.”
   
   Try: “When you passed me over for the new client project, it made me feel undermined. I felt like you didn’t trust that I could handle competing priorities. It also affects my confidence when you point out my mistakes in front of other people. I value your feedback, but I would appreciate if you could give that to me in private and help me understand how I can do better.”

3. Keep an audit trail of information. Keep detailed records of interactions, assignments, and any inappropriate behavior directed towards you or others. In dire situations where you may need to seek help from human resources, you would be able to use your information trail to show that your feelings are rooted in facts. If your boss tends to give a lot of instructions verbally, say, while walking through the hallway, you could go back and email them with what was discussed. Present the instructions the way you heard and processed them, and ask your boss to reconfirm if they look okay.
   
   Try: “Hi Alex. I want to be sure I got all the information right as this will help me do a good job on the project and meet your expectations. Here is what I took away from our conversation a few minutes ago [list instructions here]. Please confirm if my understanding is correct. In case I may have missed something, please feel free to add to/edit the list. Thank you.”

4. Find a support group. If you’re unable to find a way to talk to your boss or need advice on the way forward, talk to a trusted colleague. You may find that other direct reports are also reeling under the same stress. It can help to talk to them about their experiences and understand how they are dealing with the situation. Talking to a mentor or another senior leader could also help you gain a different perspective. They may be able to offer insight into a stressful work situation that could be triggering your boss’s behavior, for example.

5. Talk to HR. Sometimes, approaching your boss directly doesn’t feel possible. This could be because of unequal power dynamics, emotional barriers (you lack the confidence to do so, or you fear their reaction), or they may simply be unavailable to you. In which case, you should work with your human resources department to explain the situation and, perhaps, file a formal complaint. Present the facts that you have saved as emails, messages, etc, and narrate them as you have witnessed them. If more drastic action is required, seek professional advice.

6. Look for other opportunities. No one should be working for someone who doesn’t respect them, makes them feel undermined, or makes their work life hell. While you can do all that you can to maintain high work standards to protect yourself from unwarranted criticism, a toxic boss may still find ways to belittle you. If a boss’s toxic behavior has become intolerable and all else fails, actively seek out other opportunities. If the company you’re working for is a place you like, you could reach out to HR and talk about other roles within the company. If you feel the toxicity is a widespread issue within the organization, look for opportunities outside.

Working for a toxic boss can be devastating and can have a lasting impact on your mental and physical health. No one should suffer at the hands of a toxic boss.

More Resources

• When Should You Take a Problem to HR?

• Stop Making Excuses for Toxic Bosses

• How to Heal After a Toxic Incident at Work

• What to Do When You Have a Bad Boss

• HBR Guide to Navigating the Toxic Workplace (HBR Press book)

• How Do I Work with a Difficult Boss? (Coaching Real Leaders podcast episode)

Copyright 2025 Harvard Business School Publishing Corporation. Distributed by The New York Times Syndicate.

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